Monday, May 9, 2011

The Obvious but Oblivious Fable of Love

Lying beneath the dust, hidden in the cryptic past; lay a fable of a mighty king. The chronicles of his injustice and his lust for power,
The pain of finding joy amongst sorrows of anyone who stood in his front; eventually condemning him to his death, the truth he learned in his last hour.
He was given the burden on a young shoulder,guided by instinct he had to extended his arms and protect a small kingdom, doing all the he could
The fountain of his youth turned into a battle to defend, his love turning into ruthless hate as he picked up threads and vowed to be the mightiest ruler that ever stood.
Fights turned into wars, as he conquered lands known and unknown, his might ruling his mind, he became a symbol of evil to his subjects,
Slashing the throat of his wife for adultery, ensuring slavery on peasants for the rest of their dogmatic lives,he truly became poison in all aspects.
Eventually, his eyes met with a nomad in one of the villages, had he truly found love? or was it a mere mirage that would  be evanescent when it promised eternity?
The girl was on the verge of bearing his child, until the demons in the king's head filled the lake of love with poison and profanity.
He decided to slay the unborn child, ending the hallucination of love, the girl decided to run away and stay in hiding,
She left behind a prophecy, that the child will return and avenge, and take the life of the ruthless king and in his last breath, will he discover this finding.
The king in rage, tried to hunt them down but in futility to no avail. His blood boiled and he became tyrannical as ever,setting out to conquer the universe,
Injustice spilled out from the waters and land, as He destroyed serenity infiltrating it with profanity. His march forward ,no soul could put in reverse
He banished anyone who stood his way, even the closest who tried to sweeten his poison with love, he became obsessed to rule every land,
His every move had vengeance, ruthless and unjust; the chances of him turning back was grim as days passed into months into years, he turned into ruler he planned.
One fine morning, the visually frail king fell ill with a mystery disease with no cure, and he lay bound to his bed, not even his ego could him the push,
Medicine men were summoned from unknown corners, they tried to drug him into ease, tried every oil and herb, tried every plant and bush.
The king realized that his time had come, and there entered a young sage claiming he had the cure for everything mundane,
The king could barely see, but he could hear well and feel his aura filling the room replacing negativity and regret with a burning flame.
The young sage concluded to the king in private, that the king might have won several wars in his time,
But his battle to win himself was unsuccessful, he had on his head, killing his conscious as the most heinous crime.
The king might have all the precious gems and wealth, but to what extent does it really count?
He could not buy time and rewind it, and cherish moments with the loved ones who were slayed on his account.
The king was conqueror of lands, but not a conqueror of hearts and in the end even he is not the rightful owner of the mother,
His own ego and arrogance were just a mere exoskeleton, inside lay a little child like any one of us who just wished love would enter and smother.
These words pierced through the Kings heart, the young sage pronounced if you never give love you never get love back in return, out of his body came his soul and flew,
The king had left with a little rue, a glimmer of  acceptance of his wrong and the prophecy of his end had finally come true.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

But..I still haven't found what I'm looking for (3/3 The Finale for St.Valentines 2011)



As for me, I always celebrate St.Valentines as much as I celebrate Nag Panchami. The day is special et al, more commercial than real and hence I am going to pen down the most cheesiest sentences I have ever penned. After all, being cheesy is the real spirit of St.Valentines no?

In the end it all boils down to four letters that make a word. Crap or Shit to start with, the four letter word that always brings a change is Luck. Ride your luck and you shall encounter Fate. We all search only for a solitary feeling called Love and with it, one virtue that you should never pass is Hope. Sum it all, and you get this fantastic journey called Life.

And I bring in the last song, as the curtain falls down on this 3 part series. It's from one of the greatest rock n roll bands - U2 , one of my all time favourite songs. A combination of soulful music and powerful lyrics, it hits the bulls eye.

Enjoy and Happy St.Valentines 2011 to one and all.!!!


Video : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnD6ojjA0OA

Mp3 : http://www.emp3world.com/mp3/49949/U2/I%20Still%20Haven%27t%20Found%20What%20I%27m%20Looking%20For



I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

I have climbed highest mountains
I have run through the fields
Only to be with you
Only to be with you
I have run
I have crawled
I have scaled these city walls
These city walls
Only to be with you

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for
But I still haven't found what I'm looking for

I have kissed honey lips
Felt the healing in her fingertips
It burned like a fire
This burning desire

I have spoke with the tongue of angels
I have held the hand of a devil
It was warm in the night
I was cold as a stone

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for
But I still haven't found what I'm looking for

I believe in the Kingdom Come
Then all the colors will bleed into one
Bleed into one
But yes I'm still running

You broke the bonds
And you loosed the chains
Carried the cross
Of my shame
Oh my shame
You know I believe it

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for
But I still haven't found what I'm looking for
But I still haven't found what I'm looking for




Curtain closure. End of saga. Tomatoes!!!

                                                                           xxxxxxxx

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Koi aaney waala hai ( 2/3 for St. Valentines 2011)



Now life is such a bitch that a single person has to see a lovey-dovey couple and feel like crap. Shit that guy/girl looks so happy; and vice versa after sometime in a relationship, whenever a group of guys/girls are chilling you feel stuck and wish you had the freedom just to be! Which side is better? Honestly, its the second one until and unless you have a kleptomaniac partner. After reading Paolo Coelho's books, you feel automatically imbibe that feeling that the universe is watching you, and every thing happens as its the universe's conspiracy and eventually things fall in place (Seriously read : The Zahir). As a teenager, those were the things that I used to read and get inspired. I might have made a mistake or two (human) but eventually the eternal optimistic flame did not extinguish thankfully.

Since St. Valentines is all about songs, there's an artiste I call AUNTY ie Celine Dion AUNTY and one song always makes all the girls go awww.!!!! So here are the words -

I can read your mind and I know your story
and I see what you're going through yeah
It's an uphill climb, and I'm feeling sorry
But I know it will come to you yeah

don't surrender coz' you can win
In this thing called love

When you want it the most there's no easy way out
When you're ready to go and your heart's left in doubt
Don't give up on your faith
Love comes to those who believe it
And that's the way it is

When you question me for a simple answer
I don't know what to say, no
But it's plain to see, if we stick together
You're gonna find the way, yeah

So don't surrender coz' you can win
In this thing called looove

When you want it the most there's no easy way out
When you're ready to go and your heart's left in doubt
Don't give up on your faith
Love comes to those who believe it
And that's the way it is
(That's the way it is)

When life is empty with no tomorrow
And loneliness starts to call
Baby don't worry, forget your sorrow
'Cause love's gonna conquer it all, ALL!

When you want it the most there's no easy way out
When you're ready to go and your heart's left in doubt
Don't give up on your faith
Love comes to those who believe it
And that's the way it is

Don't give up on your faith
love comes to those who believe it
and that's the way it is.

That's the way it is
That's the way it is, yeah
Don't give up on your faith
Love comes to those who believe it
And that's the way it is
.


I think its never going to happen. There is nothing in this world like true love. I am never going to find the right person.    Not.

If you are a pure person, and likes the person for who he or she is then there is atleast a chance. The modern world is filled with filthy feelings like monetary power, materialistic gains etc. Lust was always there, and its a sin no doubt but the other aspects have risen in this god damn kalyug ladies and gentlemen!!!! Ok, no more philosophy.

Do you believe in fairy tales? Do you believe in karma and destiny? Do you believe in angels? Do you believe in miracles? Do you believe that Roma will win this champions league? ( I'm loving the back striking)

I just pray that if the person is right and you believe it truly, whatever or however small the squabble is please resolve it and see the bigger picture.

And for all the singles, on this St. Valentines when you see the clear blue sky and yet feel gloomy, when you feel really cold when it frikkin hot like hell in Bombay, I shall be passing around and you would be hearing this song playing out loud.

dhadkan keh rahi hai, yahaan koi aane wala hai
saawan keh raha hai, baadal koi chaane wala hai
 
mann mera paagal dhundata hai tujhe ghabraake
gunje keh rahi hai, saahil koi aanewaala hai
koyal keh rahi hai, saathi koi gaanewaala hai
ik naya aasmaan mil gaya hai hamein tujhko paake
(ho o o o o o.... aane wala hai koi
ho o o o o o.... koi aane wala hai.....) - (2)

aaj mera jahaan tum hi tum ho
abb meri daastaan tum hi tum ho
tum yahaan tum vahaan jaane jaana
jaau main abb jahaan tum hi tum ho
 
mil gaya raasta kaisa phulon bhara chalte chalte
dhadkan keh rahi hai, yahaan koi aane wala hai
saawan keh raha hai, baadal koi chaane wala hai
mann mera paagal dhundata hai tujhe ghabraake
(ho o o o o o.... aane wala hai koi
ho o o o o o.... koi aane wala hai.....) - (2)
 
 
 
FIN. PART DUO. COMING SOON, THE FINALE...WAIT FOR IT 
 
 
 
 
 
                                             (---------------------------------)
 
 


Monday, February 7, 2011

Dhaani (1/3 for St.Valentines 2011)


                                                      "DHAANI"
Till date, when everybody asks everybody '' Describe the qualities that you ideally want in your partner'' or ''who is the perfect girl for you?'' et al genre of questions. I could never come up with a name or traits any time. Albeit, in my ever present state of humour I tend to throw answers like 'she should like sport -football' or 'drink and smoke' (I do prefer the former though), the facts remained shrouded in mystery until now. I am old fashioned and filmy living in the 70's or any era from the past that supported my eccentricity, modern times have made the world hypocrites, materialistic and cynical. The mystery still remains in a veil, as the song from one of my favourite Pakistani bands come across my head. I heard 'Dhaani' years back, without realising its true meaning, until it caught my attention and I was blown away!  A beautiful poetry based on a simple woman I concluded. It is magically woven by Anwar Maqsood Saab who makes you believe that he is personifying the winds, rivers and the beauty of  nature overall.

Below are the words - 

"dhaani
re dhaani
chunariya
dhaani, re dhaani...chunariya
kude baadal ke saiye may lehraye gi
mujhe tadpaye gi, chali jaye gi
jaisay bijuriya
mastaani...
re jhoke ki surat may chu jaye gi
sharmaye gi aur itraye gi
jaisai nadiya
deewaani...
dhaani, re dhaani chunariya
haye dhaani...
saaye may uske barso ka jaaga
mein so jaau
uski sajti savarti dhanak mein
main ghar banau
apnay ghar main kaee chand tare utaru sajau
khushbuo say bhare raasto mein kho jau

kude baadal ke saye may lehraye gi
mujhe tarpaye gi, chali jaye gi
jaisay bijuriya
mastaani...
dhaani
re dhaani
chunariya
haye dhaani
tan uske baarish mein dhul ke hai ghiste
aur nikharte
ruh uski zamino ke chehro se milte
aur damakte
uske andaz jaise hai mausam aate jaate
usse sargam bhi haste haste jagmagate

kude baadal ke saiye may lehraye gi
mujhe tarpaye gi, chali jaye gi
jaisay bijuriya
mastaani...
dhaani
re dhaani
chunariya
dhaani, re dhaani...chunariya
dhaani re..."


The video is also a representation of independent women, driving a truck, being a mechanic, running a restaurant, or a paan place or a saloon. Featuring one of the most beautiful women of all time I believe - Zeba Bakhtiyar. 

This song sends me into an epiphany, a unreal state of ecstasy and pure joy. The words pierce through, and hence forth, if any body asks me about 'the perfect----', they can refer to my blog entry called 'Dhaani' ;)






This concludes my 1st part of my 3 part series on the occasion of  St.Valentines 2011.

                                                                      (----------)

Thursday, January 20, 2011

MARUTI OMNI : The van for all the wrong reasons. AN INFOMERCIAL

Statutory Warning :  As usual the content in this post contains themes that can be rated as 'A' or even unrated 'aaaRRR'. So if you are still making kids read my blog, you might want them not to read this one.!



PS - Some of you'll may not agree with the content of this post as it deals with some sensitive issues and you may brand me with certain adjectives and swear words, but be assured that I am very serious about the things that I am about to ink and would definitely not poke further misery on this topic and everything is meant to be taken as gentle comedy.


                                                 BTW THIS IS NEWS BULLETIN JUST IN!



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                                                        MARUTI OMNI



Is it a car? Is it a van? Is it a multi-utility vehicle? It's all that and more. For decades, the OMNI has been a symbol of progress, something more than a normal hatchback for transportation and a real money saver when it comes to capacity.

But some other reports have a painted a different picture. Sources say that the most kidnappings happen in the states of Jammu and Kashmir and the infamous Bihar, MP, Jharkhand belt. Reports confirm that 99.99 % of the time (an average better than Donald Bradman) the mode of pick up has been an OMNI. So it does not only pick up cargo and freight, or apparently the cargo is actually live people.!! Fascinating statistics.!!


More reports flowing in. Our reporter Ghanshyam, says that Delhi and Haryana have the maximum cases of rape. And 65.74 %  (Sachin Tendulkar who?) of the times the wonder vehicle culprit of this heinous crime is our pyaari si OMNI.

Do you watch Bollywood movies? Old ones where the only SUV was the jeep. Come on the most fashionable car in the 90's?? It was the freaking OMNI!!!!!!

                                      

Alright this flashing bulletin comes to a close. I bet you would rather see my female co-host flash one of those ;) (it rhymes,but no reason why).



Lets leave you with this commercial with a lot of helpful information on the OMNI. All the characters have disclosed their identities and for the public viewing pleasure its dubbed in HINDI. ENJOY!!!!


PS 2 - The below content is done on the lines of the TELEBRANDS commercials that airs on tv where in Angrez ke aulaad are shown speaking in shudh Hindi marketing hideous items. This was just to save you the trouble of what my real intentions were.

PS 3 - Please gift me one.

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Hello hamara naam - Gajodhar Singh Kumar Mahendra Singh Dhoni Tiwary hai. Hum, Bihar mein bachho ko school utharkar le jaat aur vaapas ghar le aat ka kaam karte the. Hum zindagi se khoob naaraaz the. Yeh kaam se koi paisa aata hi nahi tha. Hamara nithhala tempo har doosra din garage ka chakkar lagata tha, Upar se nayalak bacche shor macha kar , masti kar ke hum ko aadha behra bana diya tha.

Gajodhar Singh Kumar Mahendra Singh Dhoni Tiwary (BEFORE)
                                                 

Phir ek din, Bhaiyya Mulayum Singh Jhadav Kumar Dhoni Tiwary ne hum ko OMNI ka ad-va bataya. Mentos nahi khaane ke bavjood dimaag ki batti jal gayi, Aisa sulga, nava business model ka strategic planning ka chitra mann mein chapp gaya.




Aaaj, teen saal ho gaye hai OMNI khareedke. 308 kidnapping ke baad aaj me crorepati ho gaya. Ab to main, KBC mein phoneva bhi nahi lagata hoon. Bhak saala BIG B!! Pehli baar, jab hum apne usual schoolva ke baccho ko kidnap kiya toh doh darr laga, lekin OMNI ke ambiance ne baccho ki phaad di.. from now I always want it that way..what? My life.


Gajodhar Singh Kumar Mahendra Singh Dhoni Tiwary (AFTER)


Thank you OMNI. Loves you a lots jaaneman!!



***************************************************************************************


Hiiiiiiii!!! Mera naam Sheela ki Jawani hai aur main Dilli ki Sardi ka walking talking tadka hoon ji.

KOENA MITRA (BEFORE)


Pehle main life se bahut pareshaan thi. Mera askar rape hota tha. Lekin mein us baat se pareshaan nahi thi. Mera rape bahut hi third class gaadi mein hota tha.



Bilkul jagah nahi hoti thi, aur mujhe suffocation bhi hota tha. Ant mein zandu balm lagakar thoda bahut savings bhi kharch ho jata tha. Phir maine apne rapists ko OMNI ka reference diya.

                                    

Aur phir? Life has beautifully become first class. Ab to jab mera OMNI se rape hota hai to main bahut sukuun ki saans lekar, apna body failakar mazze leti hoon. Aisa lagta hai ki taj mahal ke bade bade kamron mein mere saath zabardasti ho raha hai.




Maine baad me apne rape liye paise bhi lene lagi, usse maine liposuction aur cosmetic surgery kara ke apna naam Koena Mitra rakha!! I really thanks you OMNI!!! Love you..Muaaaah ah ah ah!!


KOENA MITRA (AFTER)
                                            



***************************************************************************************

Salaam Waalekum mera naam hai Abdul Rehman Qazi Taufeeq Umar Gul Panag OsaObama Laden Hussain.
Main ek undertaker tha.

Abdul Rehman Qazi Taufeeq Umar Gul Panag OsaObama Laden Hussain (BEFORE)


Mera kaam tha ki murdo (dead bodies) ko thikaane lagaana aur unka logistical needs mein kaam aana. Lekin is kaam se main pareshaan tha. Modern medicine ke wajah se business bahut down tha.
Main apni puraani gaadi - tata estate ko exchange karne gaya tha.



Wahaan meri mulaakaat ek shaatir aur brilliant aur jaabaas aur brave CID officer se hui. ACP Prathyuman from CID. Woh apna case # 185,372 the case of another dead body in the car solve kar raha tha. Break mein maine usko apni pareshaani ke baare mein bataya.



Unhone, mujhe job offer diya.!! Mera kaam tha dead bodies collect kar ke usse CID ke forensic lab mein leke jaakar Dr.Salunkhe aur Tarika ko handover karna tha.





Aur uske liye mujhe mila MARUTI OMNI. Aaaj main aise lagta hoon compared to my previous picture. Pehle mein ek dead body lekar jaata tha aur aaj mein ek saath 78.69 bodies ko stuff karta hoon. Main bahut khush hoo. 
                                        


Dr.Tarika ko bhi maine patta liya hai. Life is well. Now I called the Americans Bad Ass due to Omni have confidence and I look beauiful,smarty and handsome. Thank you OMNI!!!!

Abdul Rehman Qazi Taufeeq Umar Gul Panag OsaObama Laden Hussain (AFTER)


************************************************************************************************
The airing of the OMNI infomercial has officially ended. You may either hang yourselves or contact serial killer Pappu Gel waaale bal mein kangi and give my supaari.!


DEATH BED NOTE - IF THERE IS ANY RICH PRODUCER OUT THERE WANTING TO WASTE MONEY THEN, THIS COULD BE A MUCH BETTER ADVERTISEMENT THAN A WRITE-UP. AND I AM WILLING TO PLAY ALL THE CHARACTERS FOR FREE.!! pls contact me on - 100 and ask for kaidi no. 2169AFF

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Taking you to heaven

2011 has descended upon us and its dawned in record time. I feel I've jumped from 2009 to 2011.

Yet,2010 has been a good year with significant events and a lot more activity on my blog.

This one is inspired and dedicated to a family member, or more specifically a family whose pain and agony cannot be put into words. Yet I have tried to my best, but words are may be not enough to experience parting from a loved one with so much tragedy. The flood gates threatened to open every time I thought and inked a sentence.


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The room is filled up with lights yet there is darkness, people close yet distant, the air becomes heavy to breathe,
Acceptance is my fate, as I look at your beautiful face turning pale, your hair still prim and neat.

I wait for you smile, but there isn't any, that mischievous grin you carried when you've got yourself in trouble,
Yet you were playfully naive and innocent, to this heinous world around us, we lived in our little happiness bubble.

Do you remember the first time you won the prize for the best singer at a school competition? You ran faster than the wind to show us your trophy?
And there set in your insatiable desire and hunger to be the best and collect more accolades and make music more than just your hobby.

Being a protective brother, being your life support to your little sister, she grew up over your shadow of certainty and tranquil,the elder brother she began to adore;
And she tries to replicate your love as she raises her children today, her eyes moist as memories of her childhood spent with you washes ashore.

I still remember when you first learn to ride your bicycle without support, and how soon did the time come when your zipping on your motorbike,
And how you ran without inhibition; jumping into the lake, the shattering of the windows after your ferocious strike.

 How your mother made you burn the midnight oil, she always did strive for your studies and you balanced it perfectly by remaining honest to studies and your passions,
The long nights we had when we used to practice our music together, singing away, dancing, playing games as a family without any distractions.


You became my friend, a father figure scolding me away when you got the job in the city and had to move away,
You were so generous with the little ones in the family, staying independently , I realized that you had grown into a mature adult, and yet today I stand in dismay.

These were the hands that first held you when you arrived in this world, the very hands that lifted you in the sky when you were curious about the stars,
These very hands that will lift you up for the last time, as you descend into the abode where rest the world's greatest czars.

Why did you leave us son? You only gave us happiness and in one stroke it all went away, leaving us with a wound that can never heal, why did God take you away from our little eden?
As I walk, lifting you, your memories gives me warmth, but it does not take away the bitterness that I am taking my eldest child, my own blood to heaven.